Last night, an innocent conversation took a turn I wasn’t ready for. Cole (4) was joking that he’s too old to be my baby and be cuddled anymore. I made a sad face and said if he didn’t cuddle with us anymore, it would only make Daddy want another baby all the more. (Ongoing discussion in the house is how hubby wants a third and I don’t.)
Nate (7) was in the room and said, “so Mom. If you want to get a baby in your belly, do you just wish for it and then it’s there?”
I knew I was about to tread some freaky conversation waters when I hesitated and then responded, “Well no Nate, it’s a little more complicated than that.”
“Then how? How does a Mom get a baby in their belly?”, he then of course asked.
I knew then and there that I was pretty much screwed. I did not have a reasonable answer for him. I certainly don’t feel like he’s ready for the honest truth of it but he’s smart. I couldn’t give him a bullshit answer. I said nothing for a few seconds.
Hubby, who happened to be passing by and heard the whole thing was much quicker.
“So Nate, you know how every month in our fish tank, the Mommy Angelfish lays those eggs on the filter?”, he says. “So for the eggs to turn into babies, the Daddy has to swim by to fertilize the eggs.”
Nate looks at him,”What? Does Mommy have eggs? How do her eggs get fertlized?”
At this point I had no qualms about being silent. I changed the subject and got them moving with, “OKAY BOYS, TIME FOR BED!!”
We left the conversation unfinished. I know it will come up again. I don’t know what to tell them. Neither does hubby either as he’s now compared my eggs to fish eggs stuck to our tank filter. Classy.
When I was young, the Stork brought the babies. (Can you tell my generation???)
We also got another story that my mother was so fat, she had to go to the hospital to lose weight and if she was good, she got to being a baby home.
Don’t think those fairytales did us much psychological harm either!!!
PS: I Liked Jon’s approach. Too bad Nate is too smart and inquisitive. Better get ready more more!!!
wait- you mean the stork doesn’t really bring them?
wait-you mean storks don’t really bring the babies?
Google “how to tell a 7 yr. old where babies come from”
Lots of advice!!!
Ok, my first grader and I just had this convo also. I told the kids that it requires a grown up man and a grown up woman to make a baby int he mom’s tummy and that they rub their bodies together in a special way. This was related to an article we were reading about alligators (who rub their bodies together in a special way.) “THEY DO?!” my kids said excitedly. And then two things happened: one is that my 7 year old wanted to rub his body on me in a special way. I had to remind him that only grown up men can do it. And two, he wanted to know why he was not included in this process when we made his little sister. So, while it wasn’t ideal, in a way I was just really glad to get the involvement of the two people out in the open, so they wouldn’t grow up imagining immaculate conception.
Whitney that’s totally my fear – I don’t want to have them have a complete misconception! But the truth definitely is too much too haha. I have to find a middle ground until I feel like they are old enough for sure!
Your husband sure was quick with that response! My 7 yo was asking for a while and finally I couldn’t avoid it any longer. I told him that he was born in a way that is unlike most babies and for now I’ll tell him how HE was born. This is where having years of fertility issues and two IVF babies finally worked to my advantage. I told him that a doctor toik the eggs out of mommy’s body, combined them with the “fertilizer” from daddy’s body, mixed them together and then put them back into mommy to grow. It worked. We dodged that bullet, at least for the time being.
Jessica – you are lucky in that regard! What an easy out for now! LOL!
SNORT! ok, i know my time is coming soon, but this was so funny. Jon = “Classy”
Hysterical. And I can’t believe I’ll be having to tread these waters with my kids someday too… Sigh. And we don’t even have a fish tank or angel fish eggs for any analogies – cause that would be Classy for our discussion. 🙂